Heated Arguments…Melting Pleas…Frozen Decisions

“Do you love me?”

“Yes.”

“If you do, then why will you leave?”

“Because I really don’t”, I said to myself.

___

It is hard to be forever tied in a relationship that never allows you room for growth. It is suffocating to be confined in a world where other people are not permitted to join because of insecurity and selfishness. 

__

“Why do you have to go when we are happy together?”

“Are we?”, I asked myself.

__

I had always been a free spirit. Even my parents can’t hold me down. How can I be happy when I am not allowed to fly, when there is always a specific time when I have to leave home and when I have to be home, when there is a limited time to visit my family, when there are always restrictions…

I Understand

we talk about work, about things

but we can’t talk about

… feelings and emotions

and how i feel for you…

honey, i understand!

I would like to tell you everything about me

…and when you are listening…

i feel so special

but when you can’t tell me all about you..

girl, i understand…

i tried every way to be near you

..to get a glimpse of you

…even from afar

I expected you to be always there..

but if you can’t be…

baby, i understand!

I understand how you are

and how you tried to be nice

not to tell me

how you really feel

i tend to be vocal about how i feel

I hope that doesn’t offend you, dear

everyday that i see you

make me love you more

I hope you will understand

that’s just how i am…

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Diversion

There are ample of things in the world that can hurt. Situations, events, people, things… they are completely inevitable. Lots of human beings falls into the pit of darkness and demotivation when they encounter pain.

I don’t know what that has to do with my list of highly addictive games in facebook that I am currently hookep up to.  Go figure…

At the top of my list is Farm town.  I go back to it everyday.  It is  so much fun plowing and planting and harvesting.  Not only that, the game gives you the ability to build and design your own farm.  You can buy a simple house, a farm house.. heck, even a mansion!  There are animals, too.  When your coin is not enough, y0u can work for other farmers and help them harvest.  My favorite part is when I am waiting for someone to hire me in the Marketplace.  You have to stand out from other farmers for someone to notice and hire you.

Farm Town

I also love Mafia Wars.  The game is all about recruiting friends to join your mafia since the bigger the mafia, the better. If you have a big mafia, there is lesser chance of being defeated if another mafia attacks you.  If you win, you gain money that you can use to buy weapons, armors and vehicles.  To earn money, you can also buy properties  that generates funds every hour.  I am already a billionaire since I own properties that give me 6.5 million every hour.  Isn’t that wonderful?  If only my money is real… I’d fly to the moon..

Restaurant City is also a great game.  You get to own your own restaurant, hire people and if you have earned enough, you can decorate the restaurant by buying items on the shop. Visiting my friends’ restaurant gives me the idea on what to buy and how I can make my restaurant better.

I am also into virtual pets.  I spent most of my time before looking for a good website where I can have a virtual pet. Facebook provided me that in Pet Society.  I can dress my pet up, decorate her house, visit other’s pets (and kiss, hug, dance.. with them) and buy gadgets, foods and appliances.  I can also play with my pet.   The good thing about it is that the pet doesn’t poop, haha. It is all fun and no pain for the master.

There are other games that I like too.. like Yoville, Barn Buddy, Mousehunt,  Sorority Life, Fashion Wars and Vampire Wars.  Barn Buddy requires maintenance so you have to return to it everyday to plant and to harvest and to steal other’s crops.

They are all highly addictive and will help you forget that somebody who tore your heart apart. It worked for me…

Privacy Suppression

Until now, I still don’t understand why tweeting can be invading someone’s privacy.  I also don’t understand why I said sorry when I shouldn’t be.  After that, I want to bang my head against the wall because when I am disoriented, I do things that I will regret after.  I was shocked of the first part of the news.  That I am sending e-mails to someone even in my dreams I will not waste my time sending e-mails to… is ridiculous.  Then, I knew, it was my twitter.  Most probably, my twitter was disclosed because of the email invites that were automatically generated for my yahoo contacts when I signed up for it.  There were tweets intended for trending topics.  At twitter, when you post updates for trending topics, you can be read and you will most likely get followers when your tweet is interesting.  They were my personal updates. I was not naming names. Where is the invasion of privacy there?  How can someone be unreasonable? I have known that person for being sensible and prudent.  Where is that person I had admired before?  Well, I guess it was a mistake.

Necessity is the Mother of…

When you are deprived of something, there is where your creativeness kicks in.  I had buried that skill but it is provoked again, unfortunately. My weekend was dedicated to completing the code. I have not implemented it yet.  Maybe, I will change my mind just like how I changed my mind before because it is unethical. I have to ask myself a thousand times if it will be worth it.  It will be like slapping someone on the face because there is no bad deed left unreturned.  However, I wouldn’t want that I will be the one to return it.  There should be somebody else who will, not me. What benefit will that do to me? Nada.

I should say my weekend is fruitful. I have learned a lot of new things.  I have done what I really enjoy doing.  You know, being a customer service rep is not really what completes me as a person.  I want to program. I want to write codes.  That is what satisfies me.

Then I would ask myself why am I waking up everyday and head for the office to answer phone calls from irate callers. Of course, I know the answer. Don’t get me wrong. I love my job. I have loved all the jobs I have had before.  Although, none of them satisfied me as a person, it is amazing how I can be able to do good in all of them. Thanks to my special ability to adapt.

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